During my wife pregnancy, I read books about pregnancy, baby and parenthood. From this reading, I understood that ‘jaundice’ was normal for newborns (jaundice is recognized primarily by the yellow discoloration of the skin). With this limited knowledge, I was not really worried when on the third day, I saw a yellow discolouration on our baby’s skin. We had visitors who commented on the jaundice but also agreed that it would disappear soon and adviced us to expose her to the early morning sunlight. But when my wife’s mum visited us on the sixth day, she immediately noticed the abnormality on our baby and advised to bring her to hospital.

Our baby was admitted to the pediatric ward and placed naked under fluorescent lights (procedure called phototheraphy) as the bilirubin level was high. On the second day in the ward, the baby was sleepy most of the time. It was difficult to wake her up and she refused to feed. ‘Water’ needed to be fed to her intravenously (via the vein in her little foot). When her foot become bruised and swollen, the needle was moved to her other foot, which later became bruised and swollen too. It was too much for my wife to see and she cried a lot. As if that was not enough, the doctor came and told us that unless the level of bilirubin reduces, the baby’s blood may have to be replaced to avoid permanent brain damage. We became more terrified when a married couple shared to us how their son survived after a blood exchange transfusion, but still suffered brain damage. I was so terrified of the prospect of being first time parent with a brain damaged baby. I was not a religious kind of person but realising there wasn’t much I could do, turning to God was the only option.

Blood test on our baby on the early morning of the seventh day in the ward showed reducing bilirubin level. Blood replacement was no longer neccessary. By afternoon, the baby was responding well and beginning to feed. The next day, the intravenous feeding needle was removed. Two days later we were at home enjoying the company of our little fairy! The baby grew up perfectly normal – the picture shown here is one of my favorite which I took when she was 2 years old.

That was a well learnt lesson for me. Decision should not be done based on a very limited knowlege. Fortunately, the unthinkable did not happen.

If you like more reading on jaundice, Newborn Jaundice is an excellent article that give detail explanation on the subject.

All my worries and concerns were however disappeared after a very reassuring explanation from the doctor attending to her. She was alright.. wheww..

The baby’s head gradually rounded itself and in about aweek it looked perfectly normal with a soft spot at the very top toward the front. Her wrinkled skin started to smooth out as she put on baby fat. She was so adorable…

Those little hands and feet, that wrinkled nose.. no one can ever prepare you for the immense joy you experience when you hold your little one close to you. However, it may take a while before your baby starts looking like the angel or fairy you thought he or she would look like.

If you’d like to know more about infant appearence at birth, Your Newborn: Head to Toe: Everything You Want to Know About Your Baby’s Health through The First Yearis one-of-a-kind primer that explains to new parents, in a clear and comforting tone, precisely what is happening inside their new baby’s body, the reasons behind various standard post-delivery hospital procedures, and, once baby is at home, what parents can and should do before they call the doctor.

After my wife and the baby came home from hospital, I could feel her experiencing a loss of her personal freedom. She was temporarily stunned by the realization that she could no longer do what she wanted when she felt like doing it. She could not make plans for herself only; the baby’s needs must also be considered. As husband and father, I tried my best to understand the situation and play my role. Nonetheless, there were time communication and understanding broke down and the situation almost got out of hand. This normally happenned as a result of us being tired, nervous and irritable in our eargerness to become good parents.

Open communication between parents and flexibility in both appear to be two most salient elements for establishing an equitable sharing of responsibilities. Though traditionally, the mother has been the primary nurturing figure, the father has obligations too. He should involve too by learning about adjusting to his pregnant wife’s mood, the miracle of birth, and the practicalities of caring for a newborn. New mother normally turn to her husband for extra emotional support at this time, and he should be able and happy to provide the needed understanding and help. He should also involve in baby care right from the start. Awkwardness and feelings of inadequacy lessen with practice, which transates into comfortable, mutually enjoyable bathing, feeding, strolling and playing with baby….